Exit Timing and Intentional Fathers

 

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Rick Jordan:

Watch shakin’! Hey, we’re back again. I’m Rick Jordan, your host. And today we’re going all in. I’ve got an amazing guest for you today, and I’m gonna do a throwback to like one of our first two dozen episodes because he came on and crushed it when he talked about working with your spouse. Right. And that was something that I never, ever mastered in my life. It was amazing. It was amazing an episode. I suggest you go back to look at it, but today we’re gonna talk about what he’s doing next, Alex mantras. What’s up, brother. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

How you doing brother? Thank you for having me on again. I appreciate it. I know it’s been quite some time, uh, at least since the podcast, but we’ve had some, some run ins at some events and stuff. And we have, I know that one, uh, funnel hacking live coming up here in the next few weeks, which I’m ecstatic about both Lisa and I are really excited to, to get together again and hang out and, and just kind of, um, you know, kind of soak it all in. And it’s always a great event at funnel hacking live. So we’re excited about 

 

Rick Jordan:

That. It sure is. And that’s where we keep educating ourselves too, right? Yeah. As entrepreneurs and getting around like minds. I love it, but that’s where we reconnected last year. Yeah. Was it funnel hacking live? 

Alex Mont-Ros:

I know, man. I, I remember seeing you and I’m like, come on. Is that Rick? And I was like, nah, I don’t know if I should go up to him and sure enough, man. I was cause for a minute there, I was like, I know, I know that face and then I love, you know, I think the, uh, the black shirt and the, I think the, just kind of the, the branding that you’ve kind of built for yourself, man. I’ve, I’ve actually now wearing a black shirt. That’s just for this podcast for you, man. So 

 

Rick Jordan:

You, I appreciate that. That’s important. You know, that’s something that my team moved me into cuz I, I, there was a reason for my, the way that I used to dress. And then there’s a reason for the way that I dress now, you know, a lot of it’s been intentional before, cuz I used to wear a lot of Robert Graham shirts, like really bright, colorful all over the place. Right. Yeah. But that was a lot of like, I used to be really fat, you know, years back. And I don’t think we ever got into that, but then it’s like, I dropped all the weight. I could wear this stuff. I dropped like 90 pounds. Right. And then I put another 20 on and muscle, but I wore those clothes because it’s like, that’s really who I was inside, but I can never get out because I couldn’t wear the clothes that I ever thought could make me look good. 

 

Rick Jordan:

So I used those and now cuz I mean that was so complex and packing and everything. And now with taking a tech company public, it’s like, this is the brand it’s so easier because time is not on my side ever now, you know, it’s like wasting thought. It’s like, you look at Steve job, you know the black turtleneck all the time, you know, the way all these execs dress. I mean even like John ledger from T-Mobile right. We know him from, from Bellevue when we were up there. Yeah. Yeah. He was always was always in magenta and black, but it’s like, there’s a lot less mental bandwidth that you have to put forward. Something that doesn’t really matter, that you can look really good and it becomes part of your brand. It it’s 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Beautiful. A hundred percent 

 

Rick Jordan:

And then you can packing is a lot easier too, man. He just throw some crap in a, in your suitcase and you’re good to go, but dude, dude. Yeah, go ahead. Yeah, 

Alex Mont-Ros:

You can never, you can never own too much black. That’s the Lisa and I have that literally in our bathroom on a, on a, it’s a kind of like a little picture frame deal. Cause Lisa and I we’ve kind of transitioned over the last couple years of yeah. Going down that route of minimizing decisions, especially when it comes to getting dressed in the mornings and just get to work and get productive, you know? So we, I feel you on that. Um, it’s been actually a huge shift in getting things done and, and you don’t think of it as being a big deal of like, well, you know, um, it’s just getting dressed, but it’s just one less decision you have to make in that in the morning just to get going. So, uh, we’re following suit man. It’s it’s it’s it’s good stuff, 

 

Rick Jordan:

Dude. I hope everybody is listening picks up on that. Right? Because that that’s like gold right there that we’re talking about for real, because it, but you phrased it so eloquently as minimizing those decisions. And I’ll say those decisions because of the ones that really don’t matter much to what you said that take away from your productivity. I mean, who cares as long as you look like you take care of yourself, you’re fit you, you go after stuff, then you’re fine. Just do it. Right. Yeah. And it becomes part of your brand. I’ve had, uh, it’s, it’s a little different these days. Right? Cause when you first came on with the, with the show three and a half years ago, something like that. No, I mean within the first yeah, two dozen episodes now we’re pushing 300 episodes. Uh, and wow. It’s just insane because we’ve gone from when you were heroes. 

 

Rick Jordan:

Like we, we launched and we hit like seven countries, right. And now we’re in over 50 countries and were top 2% in the world, which I’m so grateful for. But part of that brand transition was what you were saying too. And this is a, this is not me pumping my, this is just fact like you were able to notice me and what I wear just because it’s a decision that I was able to minimize. And then something that’s recognizable too. I had someone, this is. This part was funny. I had one person at an event that I was speaking at. This was last year in October, like when I was coming down an escalator and he looks up he’s like grant Cardone. So I was its like, no it’s like, no, no, no. That’s you’re you’re you’re Rick Jordan. You’re the guy with the podcast. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

That’s awesome. You know, it’s a good, it might be a, I don’t know. It depends on who you ask could be a compliment or not, but I can 

 

Rick Jordan:

Take it as Compli. Exactly. Like I need to get a selfie and send this to my son. I’m like, go for it bro. That’s all good. That’s awesome. But they’re recognizable factor. No matter how, how big you wanna play or how, how boutique you wanna stay. Whoa, did you hear that? Right? Sometimes I like it. I make myself like, yeah. How big you wanna play or how boutique you wanna stay either way. You still need a brand. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

You gotta, you gotta copyright that. Mark that, that saying man right away. Get 

 

Rick Jordan:

Love. Oh man. Oh, speaking about going big. Right. And, and then go, go transitioning and all that a few years ago, you, you know, I think you’re still with them a little bit in like a part of an exit with Monor. Right. And you sold and mm-hmm <affirmative> you were crushing it back then. I’m sure you’re still crushing it now can, before we go into the stuff you’re doing currently, which stick around, because we’re gonna talk about dads and intentional fathering. Right. Is that a good way to put it? 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Yeah. Uh, yep, exactly. Hundred 

Rick Jordan:

Percent. So this is something that you were able to do, obviously, you know, have a good working relationship with your spouse, but you exited, why, why did you choose to exit and what, why did you choose the moment that timing when you exited? 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Yeah. It’s um, man, it, it was, it was definitely not. It wasn’t easy for a lot of reasons, but the, I, you know, when we started our company back in 2016, some of the, the Genesis of why we did it, this is the backstory was, was just to make enough money to, to remodel our house. And what turned into a remodel project became a company, right. With employees and all at least. And I look back we’re like, this is crazy. Like a year in two years in we’re like what? This was just to take care of the remodel. We were just gonna make a couple’s extra dollars on the side. And then we realized, oh, we actually landed on something here. That’s pretty significant. There’s a market need and let’s just keep pushing. So when, you know, when the pandemic hit, uh, real, we were, it was a real estate services company. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Uh, real estate went crazy and it was just, we were out really on the uptick of things. Right. So, uh, we had hit our five year mark and we, we were just considering, you know, is this, uh, we’re, we’re like hitting literally on, it was almost to the date. And um, when we started kind of negotiations on that, we were thinking, wow, I can’t believe how everything had just lined up to be to just happen around this timeframe. And it all kind of fell into place. I think it was the opportunity. It was the player we’re happy with, you know, the, uh, the acquisition and the partnership that, you know, now that we have established with them and, um, and kind of, uh, and, and, and also catching their vision too, for what they wanted to create that I think at scale, they were already, they had, you know, they were already kind of nationwide. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

We were in like a regional market. So it just made sense to join kind of forces and really kind of expand this bigger, this bigger business. So it all, I think everything just lined up for the opportunity and, um, and the good news is that, oh gosh, I, I heard this the other day. Like, you know, you should sell when you don’t have to sell and buy when others are desperate and they need to sell. And we were in this opportunity, we were like, we didn’t have to sell. We were in a perfect position. Revenue was going up profitability to all that. And, uh, looking back, we, we don’t regret it. We felt like we made the right decision. And, um, and so here we are now we’re almost almost two years in give or take, I think, uh, yeah, about a year and a half. So, uh, we’re working with, uh, the firm that acquired us and, uh, helping, helping that, that business scale and being part of their team. And it’s been good. It’s been a good ride and we’re, we’re excited that we made that decision. 

 

Rick Jordan:

That’s awesome, man. I, I appreciate you saying that you, you know, you’re still with them at this point because that’s something that as I’m acquiring, you know, it’s interesting for those who want to completely exit some sellers. Yeah. And this is important when you build it to sell, which I’ve said this before, regardless of whether you actually want to sell or not, you should still build it as if you are going to sell. Yes. It’ll help you maintain your profitability numbers that you need to actually have a good lifestyle and even more so ensure that you’re taking out of the business as an owner, what you’re supposed to, rather than sacrificing your own income for the, the betterment of whatever other stupid crap you could think of, because the reason why you build the company to begin with is to take care first and foremost of yourself. 

 

Rick Jordan:

Of course, your other people that work for you and all of that, but absolutely you shouldn’t sacrifice your own lifestyle, your own needs your own expenses just because you’re trying to make something work long term and settle, right? Yeah. But then afterwards, when you do that, you’re building it to sell, but there is an integration period that’s so important. And you have to understand that you will be there as the seller. You will be there. You have to be there for that integration period, you know, unless you’re being picked up by some large private equity firm or something like that, and you are completely replaceable as an owner, but typically you’ve got those relationships with the clients, with the vendors, everything else that has to be shifted over to the new ownership. Yeah. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

It’s important. Yeah. And that’s the that’s, that was, uh, that’s probably the most challenging is integration. Just because, you know, you’re trying to maintain relationships with your clients, your customers, that you’re bringing over, you know, they’ve, you know, for years have come to trust your organization, your business, your personal relationships. And then all of a sudden you show up one day, you’re like, Hey, um, by the way we sold and we’re still here. Yeah. However, there’s a new process. There’s new systems and, you know, there’s this, you gotta kind of calculate, there’s gonna be some churn. There’s gonna be clients that are, you know, they only wanted to work with you. They’re not, you know, they’re not really gonna be happy about this transition. So, um, the integration period is definitely, um, challenging. I think we did pretty well though. You know, when we look back at like even our, our churn of clients, uh, our ability to really get them on board, move them forward into this new world, with this new organization, knowing that we were there to hold their hand along the way. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Uh, Lisa and I, I think we did along with our team, I really, I really want to thank all of our team members that were part of that process. Uh, we, I think we made it really seamless and within gosh, I think it was within five, six months. We were, we were there. So, um, you know, so that, that, that actually, but I I’ve heard other stories where integration is, uh, you know, it, it can go really bad, you know, and, uh, and not work out. Well, I think having a good game plan in place is, is key at the very beginning for 

 

Rick Jordan:

That, right on. There’s a few key things as we end this segment today with the show is, uh, on selling, right. Uh, and ended up, ending up, exiting your business one you made intention to do so. Right. As we, we talked about, I love that you said that, you know, your five year mark, it almost ended up to the exact day. Right? Cause there’s something, there is just something like some law, some unwritten law that I know of that when you actually like choose a date, it just stays in your head. And regardless of it, if you’re actually consciously keeping that on top of your mind or not, it’s still subconsciously pushing you towards that. It’s something that everybody should do. I’ve heard it called, you know, just goal, setting, a date, setting, somebody called it, quantum date, setting, whatever it is, you know, but it’s just putting something out. 

 

Rick Jordan:

That’s saying, buy this date. I will do this. And if you write it down somewhere, it’s almost like you etch it in stone. Right. You can’t change it. And then you just push towards that. It’s phenomenal. The other thing is that integration is essential. Make sure that you’re sticking, you will be sticking around for that. And third, I love how you were talking about the timing on all these things, you know, on how you constantly evaluated, whether it was the right time or not throughout the course, that five years just phenomenal, man. You know, it’s something that you actively put intention into. Sweet brother. I mean, as exciting as that stuff is, what you’re moving to now is even more exciting. Right. I can tell. I mean, you’re just smiling huge because this is, you can tell, this is your heart brother. This is why I’m like, you gotta come back on, you gotta come back down and talk about this intentional fathering. I don’t know if that’s what you called it, but that’s what I picked it up as. Tell me about this project, man. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Yeah. You know, I’m, uh, right now, you know, the, the idea is really coming from a place of, of really, of a servant’s heart towards, towards just men and fathers, you know, over the last, probably decade when I was back in my corporate world days. And I, you know, I would, you know, deal with, um, colleagues that were, you know, working 80 hours a week, you know, flying, you know, from, you know, staying in God knows where city and state and, and just doing the work and really missing out on their, their family and their kids, all chasing all to chase another dollar, you know, and then, uh, through that process. And then even at Monor where our really our culture was really established around family. We wanted everybody, you know, to really understand that, look, we have a family, we have a family of five kids we’re here to, um, first and foremost, make sure that the, the health of the family is, is a priority number one, and then everything else follows. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

And, uh, so we really kind of ingrained that into the DNA of our culture, with all of our employees, you know, there was never any issues around, you know, if somebody really needed to take that time or, or, you know, focus on their family, we always promoted that. Uh, and then now, you know, kind of, you know, you know, still kind of get some of that, um, those engagements from a work perspective, but even externally my neighbors, um, church, um, uh, different kind of groups that I’m part of, uh, the content I’ve been pushing out is really there to just, um, you know, provide some guidance on look when we, what we did Lisa and I was very hard to build a company and not go through a divorce. Okay. Yeah. So just really, I mean, plain is simple. I mean, I think the stats are high. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

I don’t have the numbers right now in front, me, but couples that go into a, you know, that re relationship at the very, you know, are 10, 10 to have a higher divorce rate. So we knew what we were getting ourselves into and what we focused on at the very beginning, we put some non-negotiables in place when we said, okay, when we, when we build this company, here’s a non-negotiables one. If we ever felt that the business was encroaching on our marriage, to the point of a divorce, we were gonna cut the business. Literally it didn’t matter how much money it was making we’re done. And, um, and so that non-negotiable became concrete and it really guided us on a lot of our decisions where when we would check in, we would validate, where are we at right now? Are we, you know, are we on the brink? 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Are we because it was, it was, there was long nights of, you know, you know, blood, sweat, tears for the, you know, and as the saying goes, right. So, uh, but through that process, I also realized I had to also step up as a father to, to be more intentional with the time that I did have, and, and not take for granted my, the time that my kids, you know, the time that they had, you know, whether it was extracurricular activities at home, engaging with them at home, doing family meetings. So it’s right now, now I’m, I’m really pushing the idea of like having a family meeting. And, um, so through those years it was kind of building up that muscle of intentionality, cuz I do believe it’s a muscle. You know, a lot of us can be intentional for a day, maybe two, maybe a week and before you know, it, life hits and then you’re back to being zoned in on it’s important work stuff, whatever else is like priority, it’s, it’s important, but there’s collateral damage that, that comes in and that’s the, the family. So minimizing that collateral damage with intentionality is what I’m trying to help fathers right now with. And I started off helping really the blended family kind of community. Just through, again, just this pre content stuff out there, just pushing the message of yeah. You know, um, how to, how to engage within a blended family. And then now I’m kind of transitioning into more of a leadership father, intentional way of kind of living so that you can not only thrive at home, but also thrive in business. 

 

Rick Jordan:

That’s awesome, man. That’s uh, I like how you put boundaries around things when it came to your relationship, you know, cuz it clearly, that was intentional very clearly that you were ready to cut anything else. Right. And that’s what you went into it at is saying that this is the priority for us and money’s money, man. I say it all the time is that money is really just a tool and there’s so much of it that’s available out there. I mean, even in the midst of a capital raise right now, it seems like there’s so many places that you can just like unturn stones and there it is.Mm-hmm, and it’s, it’s not, it’s always gonna be abundant because there’s so much of it that exists as long as you’re looking for it. And as long as you place it in the right priority slot in your life, mm-hmm <affirmative> right. 

 

Rick Jordan:

And when I say that, it’s not like you said works a priority, you dive into that stuff. But still money as a whole, for me is very much a support mechanism rather than a priority of itself. Like money can support building a strong family. Money can support building a huge business money, can support building a good relationship. And it comes in a place to kind of surround those things and just lift it up rather than something that becomes something that squish it down. Uh, I really appreciate that, especially from a father perspective, right? Because if we go back to, oh geez, if you like traditional roles, which is not really the case anymore in society, right? Because every, almost every home is a dual income home in, in middle America, even in upper class America, almost every home is a dual income home, uh, when you’ve got the, the traditional family structure and it becomes interesting to see what people go after and it becomes even more interesting to see what they’re willing to sacrifice to go after that. One thing that they think is going to fulfill them. Uh, how do you shift that mindset, man? Because there’s gotta be a moment to where like you realized, well, all that stuff isn’t nearly as worth it as my kids or whatever 

Alex Mont-Ros:

For me and for Lisa, it, it, unfortunately it took the, the pain of going through a divorce. You know, we, so this is, we’re both on our second marriage. We’ve been, we’ll be married 10 years come next, uh, March and that pain, we never wanted to create again for any of our kids because I, I went through the pain of walking through that with my kids, with my family. And, uh, it was not, it was just not, not good. So we, um, when we got married again, both of us well married again, but when we, when Lisa and I got married for the first time, um, we made a commitment. Like we didn’t want to have to go through that again. And what did that take? Well, it took being intentional now, you know, I got married in my early twenties, kind of went through this process of kind of figuring myself out. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

And what do you know at, you know, I got married at 21. What did I, what did I know? I was still a kid, you know, raising kids, trying to be, you know, the best father I could be, but I didn’t know myself yet. And uh, so it took a little bit of, you know, it, it took a lot to kind of really do some self-reflection on the second round and same thing with Lisa too, cuz she went through that process as well. And so when we committed to that, we said, okay, one pain was like the driver. We don’t wanna create more pain for our kids nor for ourselves. And then two it’s like, well how do we do that? Well, we gotta be intentional. Okay. What does that mean? Boundaries, values, principles that we’re gonna live by and how we’re gonna also raise our kids by. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

And that foundation started to kind of establish something really strong that, um, now, you know, it’s it, you know, I feel like all of our kids are thriving. We’ve been able to really, um, speak into them in a way that they get it. They see us living it by example, we’re not just talking about it, but we’re actually living it and that’s been, that’s been a huge, that’s something that I wanna really, I want fathers to really, to really understand is that if you’re not living it, your kids will see it. You have to be living it out 100%. Yes we’re, we’re, we’re imperfect. We’re gonna make mistakes. It’s obvious. However, your actions, every day your kids are watching. And if you’re going to build a legacy, you’ve gotta set the tone in the example of what that’s gonna look like so that they have shoulders that they can then climb upon and keep building upon that foundation generation over generation really build a legs. Yeah. 

 

Rick Jordan:

So once you have that awareness to where you’re like, wow, I’m really not putting a lot of intentionality into things. What’s the first step because I mean, you there’s, there’s a lot that are probably listening that are not at the point of a divorce yet. Right. But they, they could be seeing that in their future. Right. Just because of Worthing, if they’re really real with themselves. Right. Yeah. Yeah. And almost, I would think almost any entrepreneur could look themselves in the mirror and be real, real, really real with themselves and think that that could be a possibility, unless there’s intentionality that you’re talking about here, once they have that awareness. Right. And actually accept that that’s truth, what’s the first step that they need to take, 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Man. I think actually, um, they, they need to sit down and have an honest conversation with their spouse about where they’re at from that, from that perspective of the awareness that’s been now. Um, and you know, that enlightenment, whatever that is would cause if it stays within, you’re both still on two different pages as a marriage, right. As a, as a, as a husband, 

 

Rick Jordan:

Wife, that’s huge. Yep. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

So having, you gotta have that open communication and it’s sometimes it’s uncomfortable and it’s scary, you know, as, as a, as a, sometimes you’re like, you think like, oh, things are good, but you know, under the surface, things are not good. Yeah. You, you 

 

Rick Jordan:

Know, you gotta face your own fault, right. Because almost the stuff that you get upset about with the person you’re in a relationship with are really like a projection of the things you’re upset with yourself about. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Yes. 

 

Rick Jordan:

So that conversation is tough, man, for sure. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

It is. It’s tough. It’s tough. And so you gotta, you gotta face yourself. You gotta be honest with yourself, but that’s the start I think is having that honest, open conversation about I’ve not been living up to the, the man that I need to be for my family, the husband I need to be for you. And therefore these are the things that I’m you now, you know what the, the journey that I’m about to take us on as well as the work that I’m gonna do on myself, because then that’s when the work begins. You know? And that’s where I talked about like, um, earlier, you know, intentionality, it’s easy to do it for, it’s like working out, you know, you work out for a day easy, you work out for, but do that for a year and do it for two years, five, 10 it’s it’s a habit. Right? So understanding that it’s gonna be a journey and stick in and being consistent, then you start to see, I think a thriving life start to unfold little by little because your wife and your kids are now being led by action. Not just by some empty words, because you felt bad or you had some worldly remorse for something, you know, that you yeah. Got upset about or whatever the case is, but you didn’t really wanna change. 

 

Rick Jordan:

That’s gold, man. Uh, I’m gonna end it with this question here today because transitioning into something that people can actually take action on you, you mentioned this briefly a family meeting, right. And I’ve even seen your content. Right. And I’ve seen you guys all sitting around the table in the midst of one of, one of your family meetings. I think you call ’em a family huddle right. In your, in your content. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

I’ve been vacillating terms. Yeah. Because I think family huddle got, but you know, I want you to, I love where we’re going right now. So I’ll let you, cause I, I really wanna dive into this 

 

Rick Jordan:

Piece. Right. Please do tell me the structure that you follow with the benefits are all of that, man, you know, just a, an overview that people can maybe take some action on today. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Yeah. So it’s, it’s, it’s interest. It’s interesting. So the family meeting we’ve been doing it for, for years. Um, within our, within our home, we haven’t always been consistent. We, we struggled with challenges of like, you know, an agenda. How do you do an agenda for a family meeting? And when you got little toddlers and you got kids and they’re running around, like how do you keep them engaged? Uh, how do you make sure that you have a focus time to where you’re gonna get things done that matter to the family and how do you stay consistent? And through the years we’ve had ups and downs of this, of, of, of, you know, really hitting it, you know, really good and doing all the right things and, and really seeing progress. And then we let things wa uh, waiver and lack of consistency. And it all, it all kind of stemmed from a lack of structure. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Uh, a lack of like having, having something that is going to be, um, you know, scheduled concrete and really just getting started at the end of the day. So, uh, through the, through the years I’ve had this idea, oh my gosh, there’s a lot of planners out there. There’s a lot of planners out there that talk about productivity, planners, you know, you name it. I mean, there’s all sorts of planners, but I haven’t found one. That’s dedicated to like a family meeting. So, uh, Lisa and I were like, all right, let’s, let’s do this to help families out and try to help them kind of, uh, get some structure, give them some instruction on how to, how to do a family meeting and then launch. Right. So, um, or last few months we’ve been working on a family planner. Uh, we have, you know, I’m not gonna promote it here, but we got, I’m not promoting it. Um, just kind of showing it to, to the, to the, to the group here. But, um, the whole idea around this is this, how many meetings are you having on the corporate and any corporate week? Right. 

 

Rick Jordan:

I have a handy relationship with zoom. I mean, Yeah. Yep. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

And, and so the, I feel like the enemy of a family meeting is this idea that you’re going to compartmentalize it as if it was a corporate meeting who wants to do another corporate meeting, nobody. Right. You know, a lot of ’em are unproductive. A lot of ’em waste waste time. They could be done probably in a three sentence email, you know, and you, and it just it’s inefficient a lot of times, not, not always, but a lot of ’em are. So the moment, the, the word that’s why I was like vacillating between huddle and, and meeting was because I, I didn’t wanna stick with a, a word that might give somebody that, that wrong idea of like, Hey, this is just another meeting. Gosh. Yeah. I actually had, I actually had a, uh, a father come up to me and say, uh, I was doing like these five day challenges, just pre challenges I was doing just to help some dads out, get, ’em get ’em going on, just doing a family meeting. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

And the wife said to him, she, she goes, gosh, this feels like just another corporate meeting. And that dawned on me. I hit, I said, oh, good feedback. One, two. I realized, okay, this is, this is what the paradigm shift has to change. If you’re gonna be intentional. How many of us have meetings with our friends, colleagues, whatever. We sit down, we have coffee, it’s intentional. We schedule it. And we get a lot of value. There’s a lot of discussion. There’s a lot of back and forth. And we leave feeling like we help somebody. We serve somebody yet. When we get home, we walk in the door, we have no intention. We might. Yeah. Obviously we love our family. We love our kids, wives and all that. And, and then we think of like, okay, we got family matters to talk about, we got schedules. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

We got, we got chores. We got like trips. We got, you know, Hey, poor values. Like, what does that even mean to our family? All these things. I mean, you get million things you could talk about, but yet we, we neglected the one place that you should never neglect the time to gather and talk about what really matters is at home. Yet we do it all day long. We never neglect it when it comes to work, when it comes to friends, colleagues and so on. So the idea is like, how do from a leadership perspective, how to get fathers to really kind of own it, step up, take, take action, get your family together, build better communicators. By the way, our kids sit around the table, they’ve been doing it. Some of our kids now they’re teenagers, but they were doing it when they were young. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

When we would go around the horn, like I like to call it around the kind of table. Yeah. We say, Hey, what’s your, um, give us an update of what’s going on the age of three. They were saying, uh, I had a good day today. I played with my friend. Perfect. That’s all I need. We don’t need it to be extensive. We go around the table over the years. The question becomes now more. I think there’s a lot more now to, to discuss because they’ve been, there’s a habit formed of like how to communicate, what matters to them. Right. And bring to the surface at that time, things that we could talk about to help them, if they’re struggling with an issue or just even celebrate a win. Right. And then that sets the tone for the meeting. And then from there, we talk about agenda top. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

You know, we have like a top five agenda items that we talk about. Um, we take open action items. Things are gonna move, you know, the needle over the week. And then we adjourn and then we’re done, it’s usually 30 minutes to an hour. And, uh, depending on, um, you know, how many kids are there and so on, we got even college kids that will pop in every now and then, uh, through FaceTime with us. You know, I have my daughter she’s in, uh, Washington state university. Um, so she’ll pop in if she has time and I know she’s busy, uh, but we, we open her up to her too. So she’s, it’s not like, just cuz she’s not here. She’s not part of the meeting. You know? So anyhow, the goal is to, to be intentional with that time, get engagement with your family and let them share what’s going on while at the same time kind of discussing things that really matter to the family. So you can move the family forward. 

 

Rick Jordan:

That’s beautiful, man. And this sounds like it’s a course that you’re working on right now too, and you’re gonna launch a planner to everyone. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

So right. Uh, right now we we’ve, I know 

 

Rick Jordan:

You’re not promoting us, so I’m gonna promote you because I think it’s very, yeah, 

Alex Mont-Ros:

No, I appreciate that. Um, no, right now we, we have a prototype of a planner that we’re pretty much given away and our goal is, uh, to really just get feedback on 

Alex Mont-Ros:

How does it work? You know? Uh, what, what do you think we need to change that would make your time more intentional when you do have your family meeting? Yeah. So right now we’re in this prototype type of phase of just understanding. It’s not, you know, this is not a, this is like a passion project for us right now, just to understand what are the real challenges for families having a committed time together and then getting that feedback loop in and then over time, we’ll figure out if there’ll be a course or not. Right now, what I’ve learned is I’m just taking one step at a time, you know, and right now everything’s just been, um, you know, pretty much a passion project just to help dads. I’ve been given these away to a bunch of fathers here, use it, uh, let me know what you think. And, and I just wanna get the feedback. So then I can, I can better serve them later on down the road. 

 

Rick Jordan:

That’s awesome, man. Where can, uh, where can anybody get in on this or are you accepting applications to be in the yeah, yeah, yeah.

Alex Mont-Ros:

Yeah. I would say, uh, just follow me on, on Instagram at dad’s dad’s step up is the, my username, if, I mean Alex mantras, but at dad’s step up and just DM me, you know, it’s a simple DM. Um, and I can then, you know, talk through it, um, send you a copy. Um, and you know, and then just use it. All I ask is that if I give it to you just use it, but I don’t, I’m not making money on this. There’s nothing. I just need people using it. And then I just want to hear how it’s changing the, the dynamic of how they’re engaging with their family consistently with intention 

 

Rick Jordan:

That’s beautiful 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Week over week, cuz it can’t be like you do it one week and then you take a three weeks off. Like this thing has to be consistently done to where you’re communicating on a consistent basis with your family on things that really map 

 

Rick Jordan:

That’s fan. That’s a fantastic offer. Everyone. I hope you’re listening because this is a golden opportunity that really has the potential to change your family dynamic and change your life. I’ve known Alex for a long time. He’s an amazing dude. And when it comes to your family, dude, you, you are all in, dude. Thanks for coming on today, man. 

Alex Mont-Ros:

Yes. Thank you. I appreciate it.