About the Episode
Most people are always told to not rub things into their friend’s faces. That it’s not nice to talk about how good your day is, when their day isn’t going well at all. But I’m here to tell you that it’s okay to feel good, when a friend feels bad.
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Episode References:
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Episode Topics:
- Letting your peers pull you down
- Being the light at the end of the tunnel
- Creating the moments to inspire
- Accepting that you’re OK, and your friends aren’t.
What’s Shakin’? Hey, it’s good to have you back with me, and today we are going all in. I’ve got some cool stuff to run through with you today, La There was an episode that just dropped a little bit ago. I talked about depression, and I want you to go back and listen to that too, when this is done. And you want to share all both of these episodes out with like three people at least, because these are good ones. You know, last time I talked about depression was about how to pick yourself up from the bad state of the overprescription of antidepressants in our country, in the United States. Today, I’m gonna talk about the other side of this, about feeling good and how it’s okay because I even said something like this in, in the episode about depression. You know, like, it’s okay that you feel bad, which it absolutely is, okay, But there’s so much emphasis, Oh my gosh, there is so much emphasis on it’s okay to not be okay, right?
And this tags off of that, that almost nobody ever talks about that it’s okay to feel good even when other people don’t. And this is something like it, you know, you’re around if you’re around negative people or if just somebody’s having a very bad day period and you just feel brought down upon that. It’s almost like we, we can sometimes be dragged into that just out of judgment of the other person’s like, Hey, I’m having a bad day. How are you doing so well? Or, Why should you be doing so well? When I’m having this bad day? I need you to feel bad with me and commiserate with me, because I just need a friend. I just have to vent. I, I had another episode about venting too, on how to make sure that that person is in a place where they can hold the space for you to actually vent.
You know, that’s being considerate of them, but it’s okay to feel good when people around you are feeling bad. You could be having an amazing time in life. You’ve got stuff going, you’re actually taking action. Maybe you just pulled yourself outta depression because you were active, like I talked about in the previous episode. But it’s okay to wanna feel good even if people around you are feeling bad. You know what? That ends up becoming contagious too. It’s awesome. But don’t ever feel bad about feeling good just because other people around you don’t, you know, it’s okay to feel good even when those people wanna band together through shared misery, right? That’s the comma, I don’t know if that’s a word, but I’m making up what I’m talking about, right? They want you to feel bad with them just so they can feel bad and salt and all this other stuff.
It’s, you know what, maybe you can be the one that can actually help brands. Like, You know what? I know you had a bad day. I know today was rough. Maybe it was something big. Maybe it was something little and insignificant, but you know what? My day was really, really good. I can be here for you, but the way that I want to be here for you is to actually feel good. So let’s go out and do something good, okay? Because that’s what I feel like now, because things are going good, and this is about being active. This is a tag. This is like the sequel episode. Oh, I love it. I don’t really do sequels, but I’m freaking loving this one today. You know, it’s okay to feel good, even if bad things happen for senseless reasons, right? Out of things that you can’t control are things that happen to an, a friend of yours, a family member, a partner, a spouse, if it was out of their control that this stuff happened and you still feel good, even if it happened for a senseless reason, because things are going good for you.
You can be that person. It’s okay to maintain this state that is not being insensitive. You can absolutely feel their pain and, and feel bad for them, but you know what? Here’s the thing, right? You cannot feel bad enough to make somebody else feel good. Did you hear me? You can’t feel bad enough to make somebody else feel good. It’s impossible. So if you’re feeling good, freaking keep feeling good, even if somebody else is feeling bad, it’s okay. You know? And it’s okay to do things. This is what I’m saying, that feels good to you, just because you want to. If somebody else wants to sit around and sulk and do all this stuff, you know what? Maybe it is a partner, right? Or a spouse or something. They’re just sitting on the couch and they’re moping, right? They are moping, acting like a kid in a tantrum because they didn’t get their way at work or whatever else.
It is okay to feel good and to leave and go out and do whatever it is that you wanna do to turn on a movie you wanna watch and let them. So right there, it’s okay if they start getting pissed because you still wanna feel good and have a good time. Screw them at that moment. You know what? That’s just an outburst of anger because they’re trying to project, they are trying to project the horribleness that they feel or they’re sulking on you at that moment. Don’t let that get to you. Continue to feel good. Keep it up there. Go out there and do whatever the heck you want to do just because you want to, you know? And it’s also okay to create stuff in those moments, and this is the beauty of it, right?
It’s good actually to create something right then and there to help them feel good. Cause you, you can’t feel bad enough to help them feel good, but you can do more good things. If you’ve had a great day, it’s a great moment for you to be like, Hey, you know what? Let’s just go out and do something. If they say no, just let ’em be. It’s still okay to go out there. You gave them the choice and it’s their choice. You can make people feel things. So if you’re having a good day, if you’re feeling really good, you can help other people feel good too. And that’s freaking awesome because, oh my gosh, it is okay to take priority by doing things that enable you to feel good, even if the other people don’t get those things in that moment, or don’t share the love for them in that moment with you because of whatever bad happened to them. It is okay to feel good and to keep feeling good and to do good. This one was quick today, but uh, I think you just needed this. I know I did because I’ve been dragged down all over the place in, in some areas by people that feel like they want to especially want to commiserate with me. Oh my gosh, it’s not just venting, right? It goes beyond venting. And it is fri I’m gonna label it right now for you. It is disrespectful to you if somebody else wants you to feel bad with them.
This has nothing to do with compassion or support. Maybe if they’re grieving, maybe if they’re going through a death or something happened, that, that, that’s totally different. Having compassion and supporting that person, but commiserating with them, them wanting to bring you into the muck, into feeling bad is disrespecting you. And you don’t have to take a part of that, and that is okay.
These are the only ways really to, to feel good and to continue to feel good, to go all in with how you wanna feel and how good you wanna feel. So don’t let somebody else disrespect you by pulling you down and trying to commiserate with you, or are trying to project these things upon you because you just freaking keep feeling good and go ALL IN.
