No More ‘Checking In’

Watch the episode here:

• Learn how to banish weak phrases like “just checking in” for good.
• Discover the secrets to writing emails and texts that demand a response.
• Gain tips on creating urgency and purpose in your messaging.
• Understand how confidence in communication builds trust and closes deals.
• Watch your relationships thrive as you master expressing what you truly want.

Hey, I’m Rick Jordan. Today, we’re going all in, right? We’re gonna see what we can do today with a common stupid thing that people do, especially when they’re in sales, especially when it’s in business. But this might cross over into relationships as well, and we’ll see how this goes. I know you’re like, What the That’s a weird start, but you know what? I’m sure you’ve heard this. I’m sure you’ve used these phrases before, something like, Hey, I’m just checking in, or I’m just following up. You know, those are the most ridiculous phrases ever when it comes to a relationship, or even if you’re trying dudes, if you’re trying to get a girl, those are the stupidest things to ever type. And I’m going to tell you why. Because when you’re saying, Hey, I’m just checking in, or I’m just following up, yeah, but, but, but, but what’s after that? Yeah, that it shows that you’re kind of just wayward. I mean, the the image that comes to my mind, if you I don’t even see these things around anymore, but if you’ve ever seen those, like, blow up things that are outside of, like a store, they’re super tall and lengthy and just kind of going all around. You just don’t know where it’s gonna go. But that’s the point. Whenever I receive something like that, it’s like, I don’t know what they’re going for. You know, it’s like you’re avoiding the actual reason for when you’re reaching out to that person, you know, it can actually feel pretty desperate, or seem pretty desperate. It makes you look weak, you know. And really, let’s be honest with this. 

Okay, let’s be straight up. Is that you’re kind of wasting the other person’s time, you know? Because if I just see just checking in, what’s your response for that? You know? I’m sure there’s probably some context around there. But if somebody messages you, Hey, just checking in, what does that mean? What does that actually mean? What need does that person have of you, you know? Or what’s the what’s the context around this stuff to where that would actually make sense and appear like they’re coming at a position of feeling secure in collaboration with you, if it’s business, or if it’s, you know, trying to move forward in a relationship, or get a date set, or something like that. Come on, hey, just checking in. You know, I get those texts all the time. You know, it’s like, well, that’s dumb, you know, what do you have for me right now, especially if it’s business, you know, and it’s somebody maybe who I haven’t done business with before that I was exploring, or even somebody that I have like, hey, just checking in. No, that’s not it. You know. I even teach my people that this is the way to operate with phone calls. It’s like text messages are read 98% of the time period. The absolute best way to get a hold of somebody and to make sure that your message is received is a text message, hands down, because phone calls, you can ignore them. Voice mails. I never listen to them, and I know a lot of people don’t. I wish it was a way to just straight up disable it on my phone. 

But text messages, 98% of the time that person will receive your message. And I’m not talking about receiving just as just the phone grabbing it from the airwaves. I’m saying that they actually read it. You know, when I say receive the message, like, oh, they received my letter, which means that they read the letter. 98% of the time a text message will be read. It is the best way to get your message across. So when you send something, are you really gonna waste that person’s time, business relationships, whatever, with just checking in or, Hey, I’m following up? State, what you need to state, you know? So if I make a phone call as an example, right? If I make a phone call, there is always a two-line text that I will send afterward, whether this is business or personal, I might put a Hey and the name in there as the first line, to make it three lines, right? But it was just, but after that, say it’s like, Matt, right? Hey, Matt, just called you. Isn’t that better than just following up because I’m not leaving a voicemail, because nobody listens to them, or they sit there for days to listen to somebody’s phone, right? They’ll see the missed call, but then they’ll see an important message for me, something that shows that I have a purpose for trying to get a hold of that individual. That shows that I am coming to you for a reason. I am not wasting your time. So it’s like, Hey, man, just called you. I’m checking to see if you’re ready to move forward with the agreement. And that’s it, right? You are stating your definitive purpose, right? Or it’s like, hey, Jill, I can’t think of a better woman’s name right now than Jill. 

That’s funny to me. Jill, hey, Jill, you know, looking forward to our date Saturday nights like, literally, that’s it. That is it. Even if you just called, they’ll see the missed call. But that’s it. That’s all that it is, right? Or, Hey Jill, you know, I’m in the gym getting fit for our date this Saturday night. Everything’s still good, you know, whatever it is, and that’s, that’s a confirmation text, you know, without saying I’m just calling to confirm, or I’m just texting to confirm. You know, you are assuming that, but you’re coming to this, this party, whether it’s business. You’re in sales, or whether it’s just any kind of relation, even to your boss, whatever it is, you’re coming to this message with a purpose where you don’t look weak, you don’t look like you’re insecure, you look like somebody who knows that. You have a valid reason to be contacting this person, and you’re stepping into that right then and there, to where you are not afraid to approach this person. You have a purpose that is important to them, for you to approach them in a message, in a text message, in an email. I hate emails, but still, if you’re going to email, you know, God, how many times have you seen the subject line in an email checking in or ready for this one touching base? There’s another one, stupid, absolutely stupid, you know, put something in there that has some kind of a context, if you’re going to use a subject or something, you know, whatever it’s going to be, you know. So let’s if you’re going to, you’ve already presented in a sales meeting, right? And this person is like, Oh, I just want to think about it, which is a no, by the way, because anything other than a yes is a no, even with a date, by the way, I just want to be real about that with you right now.  

You’re asking a woman now, like, I don’t know, you know, well, maybe let me get through that. It’s a no, it’s a no, and be like, Hey, no problem. You know what? I’ll ask you again next week and see if there’s a day that we can find to go out. In the meantime, I’m gonna make some other plans cool that show a position of security, the same with a business venture, right? It’s like, Hey, no problem. If you need some more time, it might just not be the right timing for you right now. So maybe I should close the file with a question mark. How’s that? And then, you know, when I use that before people are like, whoa. Time out. No, no, I literally just need another three or, you know what? No, I really want to, I really want to talk more. I just had a question. You know, when can we talk? You do something like that when you’re from a position of strength and people respond. They absolutely respond. And the strength you are displaying by just being confident in your purpose for approaching that person, in your reasoning for approaching that person, for what you need to talk with that person about, you are placing importance on that, and they can see it much more than checking in or touching base. You need to bring confidence to your interactions. Every single one of them people respond to that. This is for men and women alike, too. Not kidding. Why would you want to waste time like that? And this is not removing emotion from it. Because, I mean, you can deliver a two-sentence emotional text message just as easily as you can to a two-sentence, moving the business deal along. 

The message, absolutely, you know, it’s like, even, like, Hey babe, just called to tell you, I really enjoyed last night, looking forward to this coming weekend. Seriously, like, that’s it. That’s it. It’s simple. You are expressing the real reason for your calling. It wasn’t just a check-in. You’re saying you had a purpose. And you know what? For women, come on, guys, that’s like validation, emotional validation, right there. And they, they know this stuff, because instead of you saying hey, just checking in, or just call to say hi, you know that’s a position of weakness where they’re saying hey, I just called to tell you I really enjoyed our date last night. You are validating that moment that is much more powerful, much more strength-based than just checking in or just calling to say Hi. Come on now, I know you’re with me on this. Okay, so instead of some of that stuff, you know, here’s some things that you actually can say. I know I’ve given you a lot so far, but here’s some, like, I’m calling to see if it makes sense to sign the agreement. That’s one thing that you can say, right? Instead of saying I’m checking in, it’s like, Hey, this is business, right? I’m calling to see if your team has any questions, you know, like you’re literally saying, like, I have a definitive purpose in mind. This isn’t open-ended, where I could just waste your time because I’m insecure and hoping that you’re going to say, hey, I want to do the deal anyway. By the way, that’s freaking weak when it comes to salespeople. 

That’s called not asking for the order, and it is the number one reason why sales don’t get closed is because you don’t close the sale. You don’t say, ready to move forward, or let’s move forward, whatever it is that’s a close. You don’t close. Here’s what we’re talking about closing here. Okay, imagine if you are okay, dude, right? Imagine if you’re, you’re ready to propose to the love of your life. Okay? And you, you get down on one knee, and you just stay there. You don’t say anything. You just look up, and here they are looking down, and you’re like, What the fuck are you doing? You know, they’re thinking you’re tying your shoe. They’re thinking like, maybe you got, like, some gas. They’re thinking maybe you got, you know, some kind of a groin pull or something like that. Something happened right there at that moment. They’re like, What are you doing down there? And then you’re just staying there. That’s the equivalent of what I’m talking about, about just checking in. It’s so weak because you are not definitive about what you’re doing. Oh, man, I hate it when this happens to me, because it’s like, Nope, I’m gonna write you off. I’m gonna freaking write you off. Okay? Instead. Said, do something like this, right? Just wanted to see if you’ve had a chance to review whatever it is, right? Let’s discuss next steps and move forward. That’s pretty clear, I would have to say. And then other things you need to do is, like, create urgency around this stuff. 

I’m back to business and sales creating urgency in your notifications, in your messages, in what you tell people, is absolutely important, because it places more importance on what you’re saying. It places more validity on what you’re telling them. It’s like we’re nearing the end of the month, okay, as an example, this is creating urgency. I wanted to confirm your thoughts on whatever that deal is. Right on the deal, let’s ensure everything’s on track. It’s collaborative. It’s stating there’s a purpose, and it elicits a response, versus just checking in or touching base or whatever other bullshit that there is. You are eliciting a response from them because you are coming to them with purpose. I’m telling you, you switch this one thing around. You’re gonna see your career skyrocket, you’re gonna see your business grow, and you’re gonna see your dating relationships improve. Yeah, I’m talking to mostly guys as far as this goes, because of my examples. But you know what? Women, it’s the same thing, girls, ladies, it’s the same thing. You show up with confidence and you actually express what you want, you’re gonna actually get what you want. Did you catch that? When you express what you want, you actually have a much better chance of getting what you want. It’s that simple. All right, take this to the bank, take this to the marriage altar. Take it anywhere you want, because this is way better than just floating around like that lanky thing in front of a store. No more just checking in, no more touching base. From now on, you speak and text with purpose.