About the Episode:
We’ve all been complainers at some point, but it’s crucial to understand the impact it has. Complaining might feel like doing something, but in reality, it accomplishes nothing. It’s an ego trip, a quick hit of dopamine that leaves us feeling empty. I discuss the importance of moving beyond complaining to actually contributing to solutions. Whether it’s in personal relationships, business, or everyday life, it’s about turning complaints into action. This episode is about empowering you to be part of the solution, not just part of the noise.
Listen to the podcast here:
Watch the episode here:
- Understand the real impact of complaining on your life and others.
- Learn how to transform complaints into constructive actions.
- Discover the difference between complaining and problem-solving.
- Gain insights into how to contribute positively in challenging situations.
- Get motivated to be a solution-seeker in all aspects of life.
Hey, what’s shakin’? Hey, I’m Rick Jordan today. We’re going all in all right, this one’s gonna be fun today. And I don’t know, this may be super fast we’ll even drag it out. I don’t know, don’t let me drag it out. But I mean, like, go for a while because I might get super excited because today we’re going to talk about complainers. How many of you love complainers? I’m sure everybody is shaking their heads right now because nobody likes a complainer. And at the same time, I’m also going to challenge you, because every single one of us, including me, talking to you today, if you look in the mirror, it’s like every single one of us has been a complainer at some point in our lives about something, right. And that’s just because we lose emotional awareness in the moments. Because it just feels good to like, vent out something. But here’s the thing about complaining. complaining, allows you to actually, this is so interesting, right? Listen to what I’m about to say. Because, you know, I’m actually like, seeing the words in my head before I’m gonna speak them out. And I start to smile. And I’m like, This is so cool. How I’m gonna tell this to you. Complaining allows you to feel like you’re doing something.
For real, it’s almost like an immediate rush. Right? It’s like taking a hit of cocaine in a moment that sucks to where you feel like you were wronged or something’s going bad. You know, and it allows you to deflect, maybe project and complaining are like that quick hit of dopamine to where you’re like, hey, that kind of felt good, I just did something, right? Or if it’s something around that, think of it like a restaurant, right? Have you ever had your food come out to you, and it be cold or prepared wrong? You know, if you’ve had a steak, I like my medium rare, and all of a sudden, it becomes well done. You know, and it’s like, here’s the thing is, is like, when I send it back, it’s like, I’m not just saying, Hey, your people suck, you know, this sent out here, I will always present a solution. Outside of that, because that’s actually doing something complaining actually does nothing. It does zero, it just allows you to give yourself that opportunity to feel better about yourself. In the moment, complaining is an ego trip for yourself. Pure and Simple, right? So you feel like you’re doing something, but you’re actually doing nothing at all. Right? Complaining seriously, accomplishes nothing, but at the same time, it becomes like it’s a cultural thing.
Take a look at social right now. Okay, I had a post a little while back about ADHD, it was a lot of fun. And I was trying to talk about ADHD has been like, it’s a deficit, you know because most people don’t have a lot of attention. And so many people are at those, I look at all the drugs and other studies, you know, there’s a lot of people that do that. It’s like, Hey, I have an opinion. I’m not a doctor. And at the same time, when you look at the history of this, which maybe I’ll do an episode on this someday, when you do a history of that, it shows that a lot of people when they’re under-stimulated in life, especially boys, when they’re under-stimulated, that that’s when this condition sets on. So I’m not saying that the condition is invalid. I’m actually saying that the reasoning and the remedy behind it by pharmaceutical companies, doctors, and medicine in general, I don’t think it’s treating the actual issue because a lot of times parents will abdicate the responsibility of raising their kids. And kids are just stuck in a place where they are not challenged, they are not stimulated enough, especially boys, especially boys when you’re like four to seven years old. But what happened on that post is so many people jumped on and just complained. That’s it. Like your other thing. You know, not many, not many of those comments actually suggested a solution. Right? It was just you don’t understand, you know, who are you and all this other stuff.
But this happens all over the place, especially on social media. And you can see that this negativity breeds more negativity, complaining generates a snowball effect for more complaining, and there’s all these people that feel like they’re doing something when they’re doing nothing at all. It’s become a cultural thing. It’s like the frickin air that we breathe for real. Right? So here’s what you need to do. Instead of complaining. You need to actually do something about it. So if that state comes prepared the wrong way, like, Hey, here’s what I would like. Can you can you one, read cook it if that’s what you want, right? Read cook at medium or ask the question, how long will that take? Right? And they tell you it’s like, Okay, I think I’ll make a different decision, then maybe I want a different dish. Or maybe I’m okay today. Alright, maybe just take it off the bill and then move it away? Or if they say Sure I’ll remake it for it’s like, hey, you know what, I appreciate that for the inconvenience. Could you maybe throw in a drink for me or desserts, right? You are presenting solutions to resolve the problem that is for the benefit of you. It’s a mutual agreement. You’re not gonna get anything if you don’t ask and I tell you what, you are certainly not going to get the service that you want. If all you do is just sit there and complain. If you got an issue with someone, some other person, right and this is the thing I experienced this so Sometimes in my own company, and I always put this out there, like if you’re going to provide feedback to anybody upline downline, peer to peer, whatever it is, if you’re going to provide feedback, then you need to also suggest a solution.
By all means, I want you to be able to identify things, identify gaps, come up with better ways of doing things, and call somebody out for maybe not showing up the way that they were supposed to today. But then also go a step beyond that and ask them in that case, Hey, you, okay? What’s going on? This is what I experienced of you today. And in that process, you can say, Well, maybe you could try this, you know, or, you know, I’m really counting on you, could you show up next time, at the meeting, prepared, these are all things, you’re suggesting solutions, you’re not complaining, you’re actually contributing to the solution and problem solving, you are helping that other individual solve their problem. Because otherwise, they’re just gonna sit there and you can generate the state, it’s like victimhood starts to replicate itself, for something happened to you. So you’re playing the victim by complaining, but then now you’re gonna complain to them. And they feel like the victim because you’re just complaining about them. That’s it, you’re just bitching and just saying, I don’t like what you’re doing or whatever it is. And now all of a sudden, they feel like the victim because this person came and attacked me. They didn’t approach me, right? It’s all that stupid BS that happens in corporations and in business with employees and entrepreneurs, and everybody else experiences this. Because people just fire shots back and forth, without ever contributing to the solution. It’s stupid.
That’s not something I tolerate in my company. And you know what, if you’re in a relationship, that’s not something you should tolerate in your relationship, either spouse, girlfriend, boyfriend, partner, whatever you want to call them, you shouldn’t tolerate that in their relationship, if there’s something that they have a problem with, and it could be legitimate, it absolutely could be legitimate. So don’t step up and be like, I’m better than you. Or if they’re gonna come to me and say anything negative me, to me, it’s a problem or you perceive it to be negative, if they can come to you with good intentions, or reverse if you can go to them with good intentions, and say, You know what, I’ve noticed this, maybe this, this you can do differently next time in this way. Or you can say, hey, I noticed this, what’s going on? And how can I help? Because you might not know how to contribute to the solution. At that moment. That’s okay. That’s perfectly okay. But you are stating that you are willing to help. And right there is the starting point to try to collaboratively collectively come up with a solution, a path forward a way to repair a way to get the project done. A way to treat a customer a way to build a new system. These are all things that you can do because complaining is something that is never going to get things accomplished. All it is is an ego trip that makes you feel good in the moment. And I’m telling you it’s stupid. You look stupid, you sound stupid, and you probably feel stupid after that dopamine hit goes away. So from this point on, never complain again. Challenge yourself to never complain again, and help contribute to the solution not be part of the problem.
GO ALL IN.